alive.

December 11, 2011

Listening To: Listen to the Sound by Building 429
Quote: "Santa Claus is gonna take one look at that bird poop and he's gonna head right back up the chimney."-J
ohn-Boy Walton 
Sunny days, chilling mornings; chewing a piece of my favorite gum, and listening to blaring Christmas disco are the miracles of my life. The fact that God has blessed me with another day to enjoy such little splendors astounds me. I am humbled.


Through the ups and downs of life, I cannot think of a better way to spend my life than worshiping my Jesus for all that He has done, and is doing in my life. 


As of right now I have a hard time keeping positive when I know for certain there will be days in which I will undoubtedly relapse. It may seem an easy fix for some-just going cold turkey and resisting the urge to vomit. 


However, I cannot explain this unnerving, unnamed feeling that I have when the urge to vomit overcomes me. I get lost. As if I am not even there. What triggers this is unknown to me, but it's not a feeling I can put my finger on and say "this is what I was feeling at the time". I don't have a feeling, really. At least not one that I can put a name to. 


It's frustrating. 


But, I have to keep holding on to that new hope. I have to cling tightly to God, have faith in His timing, and His grace. He will never leave me...but it's my job to meet Him half way. And I am having a hard time doing that, because I get to discouraged with myself when I do relapse.   


And before I leave for the day, I want to share with you a verse that has really been a true comfort to me:
 "Rest in Him finding peace and assurance that all will unfold beautifully for God will work all things for the good for those who love Him" [Romans 8:28].


Dear Jesus,
I am lost, but thankful to be alive and blessed.
I am a sinner, Lord, but I pray that you will forgive me.
Help me, give me strength and courage to conquer this battle.
Amen







There was a time I was dead inside. 
You'd call my name and I'd try to hide. 
My heart was dark and so full of shame, 
Full of shame. 


But like the dawning of a brand new day 
Your love has chased my shame away. 
How amazing, now I hear You singing over me! 
Over me! 


Loudly, I sing 
Loudly, I live 
Giving You all I have to give, 
Until the world knows the Love that's made me so alive 
I'm alive, I'm alive! 


Well, every day I find Your mercy new. 
And every moment that I spend with You 
I am overwhelmed by Grace I can't keep to myself! 

To myself! 

Loudly, I sing 
Loudly, I live 
Giving You all I have to give, 
Until the world knows the Love that's made me so alive 
I'm alive, I'm alive! 

Loudly, I sing 
Loudly, I live 
Giving You all I have to give, 
Until the world knows the Love that's made me so alive 
I'm alive, I'm alive! 


Out of my sorrow, out of my night, 
You called me into Glorious Light. 
Where all of the lost, lonely and broken 
Find Your Light. 
Shine Your Light. 


Loudly, I sing 
Loudly, I live 
Giving You all I have to give, Until the world knows the Love that's made me so alive 
I'm alive 

Loudly, I sing 
Loudly, I live 
Giving You all I have to give, 
Until the world the Love that's made me so alive 
I'm alive, I'm alive! Yeah, 

I'm alive, I'm alive, yeah!

1 comment

  1. Your faith really inspires me to work hard to strengthen my faith with God. I'll pray for you if you don't mind, prayer can be powerful...Let me rephrase that: Prayer IS powerful. :)

    Much love,
    Victoria

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for stopping by and taking the time to comment. Please keep your comments clean. So, please no foul language.