The feminizing of males in our society

October 8, 2010

NOTE: This post has nothing to do with the CHARACTERS of Jacob and Edward. It only has to do with their appearance.
In an attempt to portray my own opinion-not as an attempt to slight those who are fans of Twilight-I write this post. Some of you are completely for Twilight. You have no problem at all with the message it portrays to innocent and gullible girls as it plays emotions and tugs at their heart’s desires.  


The romance is thrilling. The action is fulfilling. It is a word of intricate magic and mystical beings. Heartfelt lines and tender embraces send shivers down your spine like wild mustangs. 

 Bella’s life is different, almost surreal—like a fairytale with an edgy darkness that is both enticing and addictive. And Edward is the man of every girl’s deepest and darkest desires. He is the best kept secret until now. Everyone wants him because of his romantic passion and devotion towards Bella Swan. The way he fights the instinctive urge to suck her blood is sweet and thoughtful—almost too perfect for words to describe.

He is the knight in shining armor, yes, the 21st Century knight that has so graciously graced us with his untouchable and unrealistic presence, winning the hearts of millions of gullible and naive girls who long to love and be loved.   

In their dreams, they want to be kissed by a vampire (an epic advancement—or a full three-hundred and sixty degree flop—from those girls who wish to only caress the warm and gentleman-like figure of Mr. Darcy, or Mr. Knightly). And if I am not mistaken, they wish to become the very thing that represents Satin himself—a blood sucking Vampire.  

 Now, if you’ll excuse me, I must break away from this most passionate depiction of the steamy attraction girls have with Twilight, and move straight into my purpose for posting on a day like today (which is a rather dreary day, indeed). 

 Those of you, who are not fans of Twilight, know that I do not desire to become entangled into the intricate webbing of Twilight’s most powerful and ferocious entanglement of lies, and deceit that foam from the very essence of Twilight, and it’s romantic and demonic appeal. I would like to point something out that I believe to be apparently relative in today's culture. 

 I don’t care about this Edward Cullen or this Jacob guy, either. I am definitely not in dumb awe-struck about how ‘cute’ they seem to be. These men do not tickle my fancy or ignite any form of feverish passion, nor do they conjure up any unrealistic fairy-tale day dream that may loom in the horizon. 

 In conjunction with Twilight, I will now finally present my main point for writing this post, and that is to present to you an issue that is very intriguing, valid, relative to this ‘modern-age’ culture: men and woman's roles are slowly, yet surely being reversed. 


I am going to give you my take on what has been going on in our culture for a lot longer than we think. This is a semi-touchy subject, but it needs to be talked about without fear of what other people may think or say. 

 I wish not to take too much longer in my explanation, so I will skip straight to the point and what it has to do with Twilight. Real men don’t ‘sparkle’. They may gleam when they sweat, but never have I seen a real man sparkle. 

 Okay, let’s cut the chit-chat and get rid of that obnoxious British writing style, and get to the nitty-gritty (British writing style really isn't all that annoying).  


What I’m trying to say is that men are becoming more and more feminine. Take the two main male characters In the Twilight Series, i.e Edward Cullen (Vampire; right) and Jacob Black (Werewolf; left) for example. Both are men, but they do offer themselves up to be good examples of the feminizion that is happening within out male culture. 

What do I mean by this? 

Well, first of all, Bella falls in love with Edward, but chooses to be good friends with Jacob. I don't know what you're thoughts are on this, but poor skinny and pale Edward strikes me as rather feminine looking. And not the type of 'man' I would choose for myself. 

 But, Bella falls in love with him either way. She must see something in him that I obviously have yet to find. 
Compare him to the muscular, tall, dark, and handsome Jacob Black and I begin to wonder..."Something isn't adding up here! What's wrong with this picture?" 


How could Bella choose Edward over Jacob? 


It's obvious that Jacob would be a better choice that the Edward Cullen who appears to have more issues that just his feminine looks. If it were me, which I am thankful it's not!, I would want my future husband to look more like the ruff and gruff Jacob Black, than the fairy-like Edward.


I'm not looking for an effeminate husband. Um, last time I checked an effeminate husband wasn't on my list, but a strong, hard-working man was.

And yet, it's absolutely incredible just how fast the Twilight series has swept across America. With this alarming speed, thousand of gullible teenage girls have been taken by this dark, fanciful magic and have fallen in love with this nymph-like, sickly creature called Edward.

Oh, no doubt there are a few Jacob lovers here and there—those who know what a real man is—but Edward is everywhere; kind of like a creepy headless manikin that haunts you in your dreams. 

Does this sound like a model for masculinity to you—men that sparkle? Oh, Lord, I should hope not!! I mean, common, who wants a feminine man— sensitive and caring, yes—but to the extreme of becoming overly creepy? Girls don’t want a ‘girly’ guy friend, we have girlfriends for that! 

Alas it has become all too apparent that girls are becoming more and more fascinated by and attracted to the feminine males, instead of the masculine ones. What is it about these feminine males that girls find so striking? What do they have that a ‘real’, hard-working man doesn’t—patience, more romance, a gentler spirit, more sensitivity towards the female emotions?

It’s noted in the Bible that men should act like men, and women like women…not the other way around.  A man and a woman’s role should be DIFFERENT.  Not the SAME!  And therefore my dear readers, I must conclude my post by stating this: Edward Cullen does not deserve the position as possessing ‘hotness’ in today’s society. 


Understand that I am in no way trying to encourage boy-craziness. However, if I were put in a life or death situation—a position that required me to choose between Edward and Jacob—I would definitely NOT choose Edward.

Now, let me close with something for you to ponder on: What sport of message are we as girls portraying to the men in our society if we go after the feminine males? What do you think all the males will want to be? 


Feminine, effeminate males! 


Of course they will do this as a desperate attempt to secure the girls affection and attention. A guy’s main goal is to get the girl to like him, but if girls will only like feminine guys, then what do you think the results going to be? 


Wake up!


Pay attention to this girls; you need to know this: we are not helping guy’s self-confidence if we choose to flatter ourselves with girly men. Instead, we are harming the future manliness by even the most simplest of things, like Edward's appearance. 


For every man that becomes more feminine because he wishes to get a girl to like him, there will be one less ‘real’ man for a girl like me, or you to choose from. Any thoughts on this?

15 comments

  1. I agree with you. I actually just read a chapter about the feminization of our guys in a book the other day (Passionate Housewives: Desperate for God...have you ever read it?). I've met a few guys that, while they seemed to be nice Christian guys, were just so...soft? I think that's the word I'm looking for. I firmly believe in God's roles for us as men and women. When I get married, I want it to be to a strong, hardworking guy. Great post!

    ~Kristin

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  2. Wow, this was a great post--I totally agree. You did a great job stating your case, and it was very easy to see what you were getting at. What happened to the strong protector who is a man of GOD? Why do girls suddenly have this obsession with girly, weak, fake men, instead of the men whom God has chosen for us? Have you ever noticed that all the weak men in the Bible either change or are punished? There's a reason for that! These are not the sort of people we want to imitate!

    Anyway. I could rant forever, but I won't. All I need to say is that I agree with you COMPLETELY.

    Love you!

    Elizabeth Rose

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  3. Have you ever read the books?
    I think that you are talking about the movies. Obviously, I completely agree with you about the movies. But I think in the book it is easier to tell why Bella chooses Edward.
    However, I completely agree with you about Jacob. I like him better, too. ;)
    Great post.
    -Gabrielle

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  4. You know, really, you've got a point there. First with Twilight in general and secondly with the feminine "masculinity" as well.
    Great article! I don't think I could agree more!

    -Siri

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  5. I so, so, so, so, SO agree with you on this Emily!!!! Thank you soooo much for posting!

    The other day during music Theory class, one of the girls was talking to the others about Twilight, and I overheard her say, "OMG, Jacob/Edward (can't remember which one) is sooooooo HOT!!!!" And the girls eagerly agreed. I was like, "Ew!!!!" They are sooo mad!!! But then again they aren't christians...

    At the end of the day, Twilight is a demonic movie, and I know some may contadict me on this, but it is...it's straight from Hell, and I, personly, will NOT take part in watching it.

    Thanks again for posting this awesome "debate" (if you could call it that! =D)

    Blessings,
    Amy

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  6. Oh. my. This is an amazing post Emily!! I couldn't agree with you more! I'm a strong Twilight disliker ( is that a word ;) and I strongly disagree with everything it portrays.Its so sad to see people getting caught up in it. There is NO way I'm going to fall for the fairy-like guys, I want the strong masculine ones! ;)
    Again, this was a wonderful post!

    Love in Christ,
    Samarah

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  7. wow! i totally agree. i mean, what happened to ideal guys like prince charming? ;)

    who would want to fall in love with a vampire?! ewww.

    and werewolves? REALLY?

    all in all, twilight is pointless. people argue "but you haven't read it." and i reply, "i don't want to."

    again, great post!

    blessings && smiles,
    anna :)

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  8. wow! i totally agree! what happened to ideal guys like prince charming? ;)

    who would want to fall in love with a vampire? ewww. he's pasty white and has gold eyes. farthest thing from attractive!

    and werewolves? REALLY?

    people say, "well, you haven't read them. they're soo good." and i simply reply, "and i don't want to!"

    again, great post!

    blessings && smiles,
    anna :)

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  9. I agree with you, definitely, but there is one thing I thought I should point out. Appearance isn't everything. Now I do believe that the guys in Twilight (esp. Edward) are effeminate and that real men DON'T sparkle, but at the same time we also have to look at their hearts, because God doesn't look at the outward appearance :)

    Squeaks.

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  10. Amazing post, Mis Emily! I completely agree with you!

    And I admire you for something. That something is standing up for what you believe. I admire Christians with that quality, because they won't just give in to the ways of the world.

    Thanks again for such a wonderful post. :-)

    Blessings,
    Maggie
    www.foreverfindingmybliss.blogspot.com

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  11. Hey! What a lovely blog you have. Can't remember how I found it. I've enjoyed reading your posts. I've had to giggle at this one because I am pushing 40 and see things differently. Yes, we had vampire books and movies when I was a girl. It appears they are never going out of style.

    Would you consider my husband "feminine" for being a professional chef?? Yes, he cooks BETTER than me. :) He has been the head of our home for 20 years. Yes,he does have other more "manly" skills, but cooking has brought him joy since childhood. His mom taught all his brothers how to cook just in case something happened to her. They all aren't chefs but they can really put a YUMMY meal together! :D

    I would also like to remind other young girls that, "looks can be VERY deceptive." Sometimes the manly looking guys...aren't as manly as you think. Some skinny and weird looking guys...might be Godly dudes who know karate. Ha Ha. You just never know.

    Well, I've truly enjoyed this post and look forward to dropping by again. :D

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  12. Thank you!
    I know that as a mother some would assume that the reason I've never understood the attraction to the Edward character was because I'm not "cool", but really - I still have eyes! This guy is so unattractive (pale, sickly looking, skinny and effeminate) that I knew there had to be some other reason the girls act so silly about him. Hollywood has really played on girls emotions to make them fall head over heels for such a character.
    Yes please, if we must think of someone as attractive, let's at least start choosing men that look and act like men. Our families will be better off for it in the long run.

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  13. whoops...i thought my first comment didn't go through - apparently it did! =) oh well!

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  14. Well your right about a lot of things. Yes, Edward does look girly. And yes, Jacob is the better looking of the two, but he still looks like a little boy in the face, so neither one of them really catches my eye.
    And thirdly, yes most girls nowadays do like the girly looking guys that would rather sit in front of a computer for a living than rugged looking guys that would rather build homes to earn a wage.
    So in the end I do not hold any thing for twilight (the move, or the books).

    Thanks,
    Bree

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  15. LOL! I absolutely loved that.
    "The way he fights the instinctive urge to suck her blood is sweet and thoughtful—almost too perfect for words to describe" was brilliant.

    But really... it's so sad. I know girls whose boyfriends "remind them of Edward" and I'm going you are so much tougher than your boyfriend it's not funny.

    Hollywood has never been any good at role models at all, but to go from John Wayne to this? Seriously? :P

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